Naked Chicken

As you might expect, we haven't been immersing ourselves in the joy of cooking, lately. It's pretty much been eating whatever is close to hand, and doncha know that cereal will do.

But we have a bbq, and we had chicken. Grilling for 20 minutes, ain't that hard, eh?

I fired up the barbie and then put the chicken on. I politely asked Siri to set a timer for 4 minutes and went into the house. After 4 minutes I went back out and turned the chicken over for another 4. By then there was a big cloud looming in the west. From what I could tell from my very modest cloud watching skills was that it was raining heavily over yonder.

I set the next turning of the chicken for 3 minutes, but I could see that getting the bird fully cooked before the rain came would be a close call.

And I was right! It was raining come time to go out again. 

Did I write raining? I mean pouring. The Brits would probably say, "It was really chucking it down." Have I ever mentioned how much I adore British English?

There was nothing for it but to grab something semi waterproof, in this case I chose my winter coat which was hanging in the closet. It also has a hoodie. 

A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do, so out went the intrepid cook.

Of course, the coat wasn’t really waterproofed. While it might repel snow or perhaps the lightest of drizzles, it did not stand a chance in a downpour that would have sent Noah scurrying to the ark.

But needs must, and out I went. I selected the fattest piece and cut it open in the deluge to see it it was done. This is what I do. If the thickest piece is properly cooked, they should all be done. You can see me checking it out, below.

I spotted Sue with the phone. I swear that I was not giving her the flinger.

Here, I was flippin the flipper. I did say flipper; I did not say bird.

Sue met me at the door to grab the utensils and sauce from me.

Off came my clothes right at the door. Have you ever eaten naked chicken? I mean, chicken nakedly?

Something or other that I have done must have really angered the gods this year. I won't rehash all of my troubles for the nth time, but you would really think that the deities would have at least permitted me to grill in peace for a mere 20 minutes. 

I would have thought  that would not too grand of an expectation. But I would have been wrong.