Tuesday, February 11, 2020

Old Age is a Massacre

Photo by Danica

I know that I used this photo last week, but I thought that I would put it to use again in order to relay the quote, which I think I saw on someone's blog last week, "Old age isn't a battle: old age is a massacre." Do bear in mind that there is some humour both in the quote and in this post.

(The pedant in me notes that the colon in the quote should be a semi colon, but that's how it was written in my source.)

Notwithstanding the faulty punctuation, I think it's a great quote which approximates my recent reality.

It's not that there is anything life-threatening going on, I want you to know (knock on wood). But I seem to have been engulfed in three separate health issues for the past six months, each of which has required the marshalling of medical forces. Not that they have been too successful, but that is another story.

There have been two sets of x-rays, two ultrasounds, two CT Scans (one of them still to transpire), a cystoscopy, several hospital and doctor visits, with a colonoscopy impending later this month. Oh joy! And this is subsequent to the double hernia operation last spring. Ugh!

Monday found me driving into the city for a consultation at the foot clinic in a rather large hospital.

Q: Just how big was the hospital, AC?

A: It was so big that I had to keep asking for directions while trudging hither thither and yon for countless miles.

Q: Were they really miles, and were they really countless?

A: I confess to slight exaggeration as they weren't miles but kilometres (we're in Canada, eh?), and I think it was just three or four. Or fewer. It could have been fewer.

Whatever the actual distance, I did have to do a fair amount of clumping, which seems to me to be a tad ironical for a poor, limping bloke visiting a foot clinic.

The first stop was to the imaging department for a set of x-rays. That was far enough in kilometerage, but then I had to trudge for a pretty fair piece to the actual foot clinic somewhere in the forbidding bowels of the basement.

Speaking of bowels . . .

No AC: just don't  . . .


16 comments:

Mara said...

Isn't it amazing how big those hospitals can be. And that you usually have to be at two opposite ends of it within five minutes! As if!! Hope the medical issues will be resolved though, nothing worse than suffering from bad feet, bowels, any body part really.

Marcia said...

Know what you mean. Currently reading a book you might be interested in "Being Mortal". It's a great look at the aging process. Worth reading.

DJan said...

I read that book "Being Mortal" twice. I think it's a brilliant take on our situation and mortal beings. And good luck with that colonoscopy. I had one a few months ago and hated everything about it except the drugs. :-)

Marie Smith said...

Lol. But not funny at all. By the time you arrive at the foot clinic, the average senior would need their services regardless.

gigi-hawaii said...

Well, at least you have a sense of humor.

Should Fish More said...

One suggestion: For the colonoscopy ask the GI doc if you can have propofol, it's short lasting, you'll wake within a minute or so after, fully awake, no grogginess. Also you'll need a driver to get back from hosp.

Barbara Rogers said...

Oh you still have your sense of humor, I see. Keep on trudging on, and I hope all will come out with good easy-to-solve conditions. No more tests! All will be well.

Red said...

Old age is better than the other option.

Tabor said...

Old age is not for the weak.I am so glad that while you face each of these challenges you are keeping a great sense of humor and giving me a chuckle. Hang in there.

Jenn Jilks said...

JB had a drug for his colonoscopy. He doesn't remember a thing!

I hope they nail your issues down soon. We are up to 60+ appointments. We are experts!

A lovely post, to show your sense of humour. You need that.
Keep us all posted.

Joanne Noragon said...

Walking when we barely can is sheer malfeasance.

Rita said...

As long as you keep your sense of humor things will always be better than they could have been. ;) I had a mysterious swelling of one entire leg and still have a mysterious swollen up knuckle and toe since last June. No diagnosis...just a lot of people looking at all of them and doing various tests. You have to laugh. Hang in there! :)

Vicki Lane said...

Oh, man, I hear you. Old age has its rewards but some of the day to day stuff is pretty annoying.

dellgirl said...

I hear you LOUD and CLEAR! And, I feel you too. Good for you though. Keep on Keeping On.

Marcia said...

Okay so I did read this one before. Sorry didn't remember the title.

William Kendall said...

The only medical issue I've had recently was a sinus infection at New Year's.