Monday, July 07, 2025

Mournful Monday

When I scanned this slide, I had to laugh.

It was the early 70s, and Sue's friend was getting married. She's the one in the middle. Sue was a bridesmaid, and we were hanging out with the bridal family in the morning before the ceremony.

There were nerves, and a certain amount of alcohol was consumed. The parents were shocked that we weren't also imbibing.

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I had been going to simply post the photo, but I decided to get a little serious and go on and tell a little bit more about Val and our relationship with her.

Val was a longtime friend of Sue’s, going back to high school. I knew her somewhat then from church and better for many years after Sue and I got together. We kept in touch regularly through the years, usually with single Val visiting us. Her marriage did not last beyond a few years. 

We only visited her a couple of times after 2005 when we moved here to Eastern Ontario, one time as her health was deteriorating. Thankfully, Shauna was able to drop by and visit Val in the hospital before Val passed away. She had suffered several strokes, the penultimate one leaving her functionally blind. She loved to use the computer but was unable to after the first stroke. More than once, I tried to help her set the computer up so that she could navigate it, but we did not achieve success.

Val had a hard life. Except for the time around the wedding, she was obese and was mentally fragile, but she was a good friend and a very generous person, and I am glad to have known her.

A Happy Moment at Her Wedding
Sue was the middle bridesmaid


18 comments:

  1. That is a funny first picture. The somber looks on what should be a happy occasion. Sorry for your loss.

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  2. The first photo was indeed mournful looking and glad you posted the follow up story about Val. It was sad to read about her later years.

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  3. Definitely not a photo of a joyful occasion! Glad you had the other one, where Sue had added her smile! It is good to look back on a friend's life, and see how the times were good and not so good for them. I might be a candidate for a stroke, but will continue to enjoy croissants with butter just clogging my arteries away! This life is one of choices, isn't it?

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  4. So sad to learn she had such an unhappy life. The picture does tell quite the story.

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  5. I'm getting to the age where I'm starting to know the people fairly well that whose obituaries are posted in my local paper. I am always interested in how unpredictable life can be. Some I knew when I was young certainly didn't end up how I thought they might and those I only knew in my later years, certainly led very different lives when they were younger.

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  6. Life throws so many curves at us and I was a bit flummoxed when I read 'Val'.
    I do hope she had happy moments somewhere in her life.

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  7. Poor Val. It sounds as if you and Sue were bright spots though.

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  8. Thank 😊 for sharing this story. Poor Val.

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  9. Although the first phot looks like they are in mourning the second shows she had at least a brief time of happiness.

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  10. She looks so happy in the last photo. That is how I want to think of her, glowing with the promise of the future. I wish it had been a happier life for her. In the Apalachians there was a belief in the "sin-eater". You could pay that person to "ear" your sins. Then there was the "whipping boy" who also took punishment for others. I sometimes wonder if there are people who suffer because of the sins of the rest of the world. Far-fetched I know but it just seems so unfair that some must suffer so much.

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  11. A sad story.
    The wedding looks so 70s.

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  12. I'm so sorry for yours and Sue's loss. It's hard seeing people we've known for so many years move on. I'm grateful you two were in her life and in touch for so many years.

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  13. I love that last photo. Sad story.

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  14. That first picture seems like an omen.

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  15. The facial expressions were so grim and doomed like a funeral instead

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  16. It does sound like her life was challenging and the first photo seems to reflect that. I can't imagine going blind, as much as I love reading, watching people, enjoying nature, etc. It would be devastating.

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  17. Oh dear. What a story.
    I was never aware that strokes affect your vision.
    I have to say I do love that last photo. Nice smiles there. :)

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