Monday, March 13, 2006

Somewhere, A Bell Tinkles

I don't do this often, almost never in point of fact — piggyback on someone's blog. But I was just reading Forward Ho's recent entry, When there are clouds in the sky you'll get by, and one of my own foibles sprang to mind.

In case you don't know, Valerie has recently lost her husband, who was younger than I. It was sudden and unexpected. Since then, most of her writing has focussed (yes, it's okay to double the final consonant in Canada) on her loss and the many adjustments that she faces. It's worthwhile reading because reliable sources inform us that "No one is going to get out of here alive." If we are of a certain age, which is perhaps younger than most might think, it is beneficial to do a little mental preparation for the passages that are looming: either our own or our loved one's.

My how you ramble, AC. Stay on topic, young fella!

In this particular post, Val wonders over the elusiveness of many of her friends. Where are they? Why aren't they calling?

It caused me to think just how easy it is to let things slip. It's not that we forget completely, but when we remember, we seem to say something like this to ourselves: "Yes, I had forgotten that; I must remember to do it." And, of course, we promptly lose track of that thought for another long interval. We don't mean to, but we do.

It wasn't terribly long ago, only a few years in fact, that I did that to my mother. She had her kitchen floor replaced, and I said that I would hammer the molding (trim) back in for her. I never did! Occasionally, I would re-remember, and mention that "I must get around to that sometime," but I never did. Not ever!

On another occasion with another project, however, I put a timeline on the task: mostly because I could tell that she was quite anxious about it. She wanted a room painted, and I promised to do it: "By the end of next month." That's all that it took, for by the middle of that month, I was there, ready to proceed.

It's not a difficult concept is it? The exalted THEY say that something is not a goal until you put a timeline on it. It seems to be true, and it took me over fifty yeas to really get that. It's not exactly a hard concept, but it's really the only way to deal with those things that easily slip through the cracks.

Does this ring your bell at all?



Bonita said...

It is like walking in a forest, with yellow ladyslippers nestled under a fern. It is there, yet we neglect stopping to appreciate it, thinking our path was the most pressing concern. I wish a whole flowering meadow for her this spring.

Turtle Guy said...

All too often I experience things like this... and for what? I'm as guilty as the next fellow of putting off important stuff for the all-too-pressing "routine" or minor things.

A helpful reminder, thank you.

Granny said...

I think we've all done it at one time or another.

Granny said...

I went over to Valerie's site to say hello and noticed that I had been there before. Funny, I don't remember a Raccoon Restaurant. Then saw your next comment. Funny.

Simply Coll said...

Yes.. I hear what you are saying. And your story of your Mom's molding made me remember something I had promised my mom and then promptly forgot. I will take care of it tomorrow. Thanks.

Gina said...

Sometimes nothing will work for me but to write things down.

Then up it goes in an obvious and annoying place until I can get it done.

And even then, I still forget sometimes.

Sad but true.

Valerie - Riding Solo said...

Thanks for the perspective, Anvil.

I know I am getting awful whiny. It just seems to get harder to get through every day to the next one.

I appreciate the helpful comments from you and cuppa.

hug her for us.