Thursday, June 10, 2004

A Major Passage

Early tomorrow, we will set out across province to get to my daughter's, Butterfly's, wedding. With a sidetrip to Hamilton to pick up Ladybug, our other daughter, we are looking at spending probably more than eight hours in the car. I will need more than a few breaks to rest and stretch my creaking, achy body.

I picked up the tux yesterday. My wife says that I look nice in it, but I can't help but wonder when, for men, dressing up will mean something other than wearing basic black? My sartorial statement for both the rehearsal and morning after breakfast will be much more me. I was going to say that I can't remember the last time that I wore a suit, but I guess it was over a year ago at my mother's funeral: weddings, wakes and funerals. Who buys all of the suits, starchy shirts and ties that line the racks at men's clothing stores?

My daughter is getting married in two days, so why haven't I blogged about this before? Perhaps it's easier to blog about little things: passing thoughts, little impressions. Truth be told though, I am very comfortable with this marriage, very much at peace. Butterfly is mature, sensible, has long since left the nest, and has chosen a great person to be her partner. I have neither angst nor sense of loss, just the sense that a circle is being fittingly closed.

A wedding is just another of life's natural passages. I have learned to embrace these passages: might as well because I can't stop them and wouldn't if I could. By definition, life is passage. My life began because someone else made the transition into parenthood. And what passage of mine would I gladly have forfeited: going to college; getting married; starting my career; having children; retiring? None of these! I have yet to make a passage that does not enhance me in some way.

My own life has now passed from summer into fall. But autumn is perhaps my favourite season. It has a beauty that is all its own: a beauty unlike any other season and unmatched by any other season. I expect that winter will have it's charms too, but, for now, I revel in the changing of the leaves of my life.

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