Thursday, September 10, 2009

Obsolete Toys, Obsolete Me

Today, it is my duty to reveal the sad, sad truth about myself. Are you ready? It's this. I am obsolete. My toys/tools rather prove the point.



Exhibit A: My computer is more than four years old and gasps and groans with what I try to make it do. The hard drive is so small that I need two external drives to hold my files. All those pictures that Cuppa and I keep flashing before your bedazzled eyes must be stored somewhere after all. Heck, even the blog template (that you see on the computer screen and possibly before your eyes at this moment) is old now, almost as old as the computer. I don't even think I could design a blog template anymore. What I once knew about building web pages has all but evaporated from my tiny brain.

Exhibit B: We've already talked about the camera. I have recently been reminded of its usefulness; some of the pics that I have posted recently were taken with it, and I rather like them. I also think of the wedding last year and how the results from my camera held up pretty well against the newer and more expensive Nikon showoffs (kidding). I know this because I am the guy who processed the pictures and made the album. I wonder if the newer visitors among you would like to see the album? Beware though, it was a gay wedding, and if that offends you, just kindly move on. For those who read about my camera dilemma last week and are curious, I must report that I still haven't made a decision. I thought I had decided to drop the notion of picking up a new camera, but I find that my mind is turning it over once again. Who knows what I will do? I don't.

Exhibit C: That would be our cell phone to the right of the camera. Would you believe it's more than six years old? I mean, who else on the planet brags of a six year old cell phone? Even more oddly, its number is still the same old one that we used in Sarnia, several area codes away on the other side of the province. We haven't changed it because we can't talk to a real person at Rogers, and the computer voice, called Melanie, is no help us at all. Needless to say, we don't use the phone much. We use it primarily for exigencies, so we use it seldom because who the heck experiences many exigencies?

Exhibit D: Behold my iPod. It too is old in technological terms — four years old in point of fact, and it was end-of-the-line model when I bought it all that time ago. I think most people throw their iPods on the heap after a year or two, but the ancient, decrepit AC insists on hanging onto to all of his obsolete stuff with bulldog tenacity. Meanwhile, both daughters are on their second iPods and are now spoiling themselves with their iPod Touches. It's amazing what these little gaffers (the Touchy Pods, not the girls necessarily) can do: play movies, surf the Internet, polish your shoes and I don't know what else.

Exhibit E: Finally, I come to our ancient GPS: the one with the tiny green screen and paltry map data bases. It can't even talk for goodness sakes. It works for us as a glorified compass and not much more but that's primarily what we bought it for because our obsolete car (I forgot about our obsolete car until now) didn't come with a compass, and we couldn't even buy one as an option. Sheesh!

So, there you have it. My stuff is obsolete and so am I or at least my back is; it passed its best before date a long time ago now.

But don't feel sorry for me. Just send replacement items or cash: whichever is most convenient for your loving and compassionate little hearts. Just don't call me on the cell because the number, belonging two area codes west, is long distance.

20 comments:

Ruth said...

You'll need many thousands of dollars to get yourself up to date! But isn't that the reason why things become obsolete so quickly?

Barry said...

I don't even have a GPS. I print off a google map to places I'm going. How obsolete is that?

Tossing Pebbles in the Stream said...

I'm sorry but you will not get sympathy from me (except for the back as I share a lifetime painful condition there dating back to when I was 15) on all your "ancient" toys. I do not have any of them.

The desk computer I have has been cobbled together for items beg and borrowed and donated from friends and family. I don't think I have invested more than $250 in it.
I have a rotary phone I love and fight with Ma Bell to keep . Then there is my TV with rabbit ears. And my wonderful soni reel to reel tape recorder. and my record player whose records are the memories of my youth. My camera is just for snapshots and it was a gift. I bought for $30 40 videos which each has several movies downloaded from TV. I watch these movies occasionally still.
How about my slide rule. Do you remember how to use one? These things all work well for me still.
I have rather modest expectations in life.

I do covet a notebook computer. I have a 1995 Dell model given to me that needs a memory card. I look forward to getting it running with a free Ubuntu operating system.

When you are ready to throw your toys away, don't forget me. All donations gratefully accepted.

Mary G said...

Uh,guilty as charged. Two GPS's. Two cell phones. Fancy Nikon. But the only reason I have a fast computer (and it is a generic one that our wonderful local techie guy put together for me) is that lightening fried the old one.
In our house is is my clothes that are ten years or more older. Spent the cash on the toys.
Laughing.

jinksy said...

Take comfort in the fact, that many 'old' things work better than 'new'- and last longer usually, too.
TV news item today - a church in Ipswich has just put back their five bells that were cast in the fifteen hundreds, after the bell tower had be refurbished. The bells have remained intact, still in their original, pristine state, and were rung again after 250 years silence.

simplycol said...

Maybe it is our generation.. for I tend to hang on to my obsolete stuff as well... especially if it still seems to do the job. Although, I must admit, I am very impressed with the new iPod and Blackberry touch stuff. If only the little screens where some bigger. (these old eyes.. you know)

Diana said...

Oh AC it's alright. There really is nothing wrong with you. We are living in a disposable society.
You and I were not raised in a disposable society.
We learned to treasure and take care of our belongings so it's only natural that you haven't moved on.
Baby steps AC , baby steps. Start out small with one item. No need to hurry!
Love Di

Mary said...

AC,

Like you, I haven't fallen into the update trap that the retail companies set up. Michelle gave me a cell phone six years ago. Rogers kept calling me saying it was going to become obsolete. I told them I didn't need a new cell phone, that the one I had was working perfectly. They finally sent me a new FREE phone because I refused to pay for a new one. Apparently the new satellites wouldn't send a signal to the old phone. Go figure.

My computer is only two years old. Our other one was four years old when it died. I needed the new one for my writing.

Our GPS was bought used and it more than often sits in the glove compartment of the van. No need for a new one. It does talk and last year when we were up your way, I used it. Brandon nicknamed her Gertrude. LOL

As far as the car...it's a 2000. Not the car of my choice but the one I could afford. It is still in fine shape and will continue to get me to the places I need or want to go. :-)

Glad you aren't falling into this modern "I need an updated one" trap.

Blessings,
Mary

Queenmothermamaw said...

It takes a lot of grit to admit when oneself is obsolete. Obsolete in what way? Do you think Little Pudding wants a new Grampa? Do you think she cares what you take her picture with? Do you thinks she cares if you know where you are going when you and Cuppa take her for a drive?
You are not obsolete you'r ripening. (You know, ripe old age). Now don't go getting spoiled ROTTEN on us while ripening.
QMM

Mara said...

Your phone looks so new! I have an even older version of that same one!!! I call it the brick, but it still works very well. (Mind you, it's not even my phone, it's the company's)

Donna said...

HahahahHAHAhahaa...Just go buy that damn CAMERA!!!LOLOLOL...This was Good!!!hughughugs

Bernie said...

From one obsolete to another, my toys looks so much like yours only most of mine are older....they still meet my needs so I have no intention of replacing them.
I do agree with Donna, go get the camera as it having an effect on you....LOL

Bernie said...

A/C I just looked at your pictures of the wedding and thought it beautiful.....you took such wonderful photo's and how wonderful that you captured a beautiful day with so many memories.....:-) Hugs

Ginnie said...

I agree with Philip...you get no sympathy (much less MONEY) from me!
I have three of the things you mentioned and can remember it was just a few years back that they seemed like luxuries. Why do we
"need" all this stuff all of a sudden...we're brain washed.

Lorna said...

I had to check my online thesaurus for "obsolescence"

Kerry said...

No GPS here either...but I'm curious...and I do like these gadgets. Hate to admit it! I don't have an iPod, but gave one to my musician=husband 2 years ago, as a way of vicarious pleasure. And I was actually glad when my camera died this summer, giving me a solid excuse for buying a new one.

ChrisB said...

Now you've made me realise that a lot of my our gadgets are also heading towards being obsolete. Whilst we are lucky enough to have more than one computer the original imac was purchased in 2000 and is so slow now I hate using it. My ipod was a 60th gift from the girls and that's nearly 6 yrs ago and it was one of the first models but now looks a very ancient design-I think I'll stop there except to say that as long as we can get some life out of them we'll go on using them.

Mary said...

AC,

In response to your comment on my post about the War of 1812 reenactment. Battles were fought from Windsor to Niagara-on-the-Lake. The history of that war is very interesting.

Woman in a Window said...

OK, this is you at your funniest...send cash or replacements. You remind me of Suldog here. Ever read him? Hilarious!

My best to your over the hill apparatuseses...let me know when to send condolences.

Norma said...

I think your photos are fabulous. I don't have a GPS. We still ask directions.